More prayers...

I recently found out I am needing 2 more surgeries. The dr decided to run an ultrasound as a caution, she expected not to find anything.
Not what happened....instead found I have gallbladder issues and complex cyst on the ovary.
After the first of the year I will be seeing two more Drs and facing surgery. Trying to work it out that I only will need to go I see one time.
Will post as I find out actually what will be happening.

Appreciation

I have noticed that I have a new appreciation for my husband. A rekindled love for the man I married 18 yrs ago this month.
We get so wrapped up in work and the day to day living that we forget to tell one another that mean a lot, they are needed and most of all that we are thankful that they are here with us.
Sometimes it takes a wake up call and I
got one. I am spending time slowing down and rethinking how we talk and act towards each other. Making a point to say thank you and I love you and more hugs and more forgiveness

Thankfulness

I was thinking today about a comment a friend posted on Facebook. How so many are talking about Black Friday instead of Thanksgiving. Made me think.....and how I could careless. To race out there fight crowds for things I don't need.
What I have been thinking about and my heart is full of is all the things I have to be thankful for this year.

1. Jesus dying for me.
2. Children and husband that believe the same
3. Family that dropped and changed plans on a moments notice
4. Friends that stood by my side
5. My best friend that comes running every time I need her.
6. My best friend who holds my hand and my children's prays with us!
7. The cancer was found early
8. God providing insurance so that I was able to see the dr.
9. No chemo or Radiation
10. Church ladies that came to see me and the food and the prayers they poured out.
11. The church ladies that haven't forgotten my family since we left church.
12. My children which through everything had to help and be more in a care giver roll.
13. A husband that amazes me...when I am the most disappointed in him he does something that just wipes all that away.
14. I didn't have to worry about work while going through all this...I have a husband that works so I don't
15. Sisters even though far away stayed with me the whole way through
16. The MAYS so many of the families and students that let me know I was missed
17. The friends that came from Orlando to clean my house and brought food.
18. Flowers I received
19. Emily and Maureen for caring so much... Our families are linked together forever.
20. My husband for holding me and loving me.

Blessings and Praise

I haven't been able to post recently since right after I saw the dr and received the wonderful news over no chemo or radiation. Cancer was not in the lymph nodes!
I fell sick to 2 infections. The one dehydrated me and the other made my emotions and feelings go haywire. I cried, was scared and depressed all at the same time. I knew something was wrong it made no sense.....God is good and took care of me once again. I was sent to the ER....where they checked for blockage and found I was healing perfectly. It is with God that the 2nd infection was even found. It was at my release from the ER that they decided to even look for it.

It has been a rough road. It is great to be back to myself. I am blessed my husband that helped take care of me (he truly amazes me still of how he can be right by my side at the worst moments) and my best friend and sister Julie who ran to my side and allowed me to cry on her shoulder and pray with me and my children.
My mother in law that dropped all she was doing when I called needing her.

I was told by a nurse in the hospital that I was blessed more then she has ever seen. She had never seen one person have so many come visit and do so much......I am grateful for everyone that prepared food, visited and prayed for me and my family.

This week the labs will be run again to makes sure the infections are gone.

Feeling better...

I am beginning to feel better but do need to remember not to over do it. Which seems like I keep doing.....then I get reminders of no lifting.

Need to call the dr Monday to schedule a follow up appt. and the results from pathology.

Home resting

Thank you for all your prayers!!!!

Surgery went well, still waiting results from pathology, about the depth and lymph nodes to know the stage and if chemo is needed.

I am so thankful for all the food that friends have prepared for us. Has really been a blessing.

Today they all climbed in bed with me for school.
Of course the boys voiced that vacation could run longer for them and it would be no problem. My daughter on the other hand started school yesterday all by herself.

Today my MIL had come up to help so I can sleep......I now know how to help
a friend if they ever have surgery.
Never considered needing it at home with my children. They are so helpful and can do so much.....that I figured we didn't need help after the surgery. Well they are children and they want to be children. Their motivation is to watch tv and play outside not to do laundry and clean up after themselves and others. I am also trying to let go and not expect everything done as I would do it.
Nap time for me......will check back in few days.

Tomorrow is the day

Pre op is done. Tomorrow is the day for surgery. Scheduled for 9:50 but asked to be there at 7:30.
I am holding into Gods promises and the knowledge he is the reason it was found early.

I am thankful...

  I am so thankful I have such an awesome friend that has held my hand with every appointment...has shed tears with me as the news was given. She has prayed with me and for me, has knelt at the alter for me.  I dont know what I would with out her by my side.

I have a date

 October 19th is the day that surgery is scheduled. The office said to figure a hospital stay of a week.

I have faith God is here with me......and that it will all be good. Of course I do have to admit I try not to think about what I am headed for to deeply......if I do then fear does begin to set in.

Trying not to anxious

Had the ct scan done on Friday....tomorrow is the day I see the surgeon and find out my results. How soon surgery will be...

Finally....things are happening

     A week ago today I found out I had cancer...Since then I have been trying to have a cat scan down. New month came the cost share that was meant but took days to show. Then it was the another frustration today getting the approval. Insurance has everyone ones hands tied and they are trying their best to make it happen.
      I received one final call tonight and it looks like everything is in order for the approval to be in the right computer system midnight tonight. So as I sit typing I am drinking the first of my special drinks. Had a choice between Berry Smoothie and Vanilla, wasn't sure so the girl gave me berry. It isn't that bad but next time I am going vanilla.
      I am very blessed, my girlfriend Julie has been by my side, and promised not to leave it. Twice this week she has come over and helped me mentally and emotionally.

Well finishing my cocktail......thank you for your prayers

The answer is....

The biopsy came early.... I am blessed to have a friend that will drop everything and come running. She then stay by my side all day and evening.

The thought of cancer is still not really there. I have moments like this morning riding my bike I was crying.

I can only go forward and know God is with me. I believe finding out was in his timing. I believe it began with the kidney stone....that was his way of getting me to see I needed to get a check up.

I don't feel I am in denial.....I just don't want it to controlling my emotions. My four children are afraid enough....I have talked to them about God's care. And that it has been caught early. That I may not even need chemo. Explained I do need more of their help. To do things to help me without being told, aka picking up around home, dishes; rooms, laundry and care if their animals. Dr. Keeps saying no stress, she even put me on a couple meds to help with the menopause stress and the stress as we wait all the answers. Has been a great change I feel the anxiety lifted.

So I have a ct scan in couple days to see how advanced or if it spread still waiting for the appt. with the surgent

All I ask is if you can keep me in prayer. Must of all my children and husband.

Prayer...

I need some strength........the waiting game is so hard. Doctors scare you then make you wait for test results. Oct. 5th seems like eternity right now.

Trying to remember my strength is in Him our heavenly Father....

Today...

Was my 44th birthday. Besides the presents were just the best....Yankee candle yum, bath rugs, Vera Bradley bag....scarf plus few other things. It turned out to be a relaxing day. My friend came over and we spent a couple hours just talking.
Then tonight all 4 of my kids played with their orchestra group at a colleges 50 yr time capsule ceremony.

When we arrived home, I enjoyed watching the boys playing around in the new jeep project with daddy. They were four wheeling all over the yard.

And then just before bed they all including daddy played happy birthday.
Really was the best year..

Mind is heavy

So many thinks are on my mind that it is keeping me from getting things done around here. I have several things to do, that need to be completed. I having a hard time concentrating on them with these others things laying so heavy. It is the heavy thoughts that bring to Jesus feet, he is the only one that can change them.

It is through these times that I realize I have been walking around as if I was in charge in place of our Heavenly Father.

Where did Summer go?

So this is our last week of summer here.....we are already back to school books. Which we have started slow with just math, wordly wise and LLATL.  I have one son that overwhelms easy so it is just best to take baby steps with him, he can sit for hours building anything out of anything or doing experiments. But that moment he thinks he is tied down to books, yicks totally unhappy.

 I am thinking of changing a few things around in the history and science area. I dont see a reason I cant work through Apologia general Science with my 7th grader and my younger children. Then after looking at Mystery of History I, looks like it might be a better choice for us I can us it with the multiple grades.

Going to go through the shelve and clean out the book we thought we might use.

Cleaning up Blog

I sure have been neglecting the blog world......today I sat down to read and catch up....so many blogs are gone...a few have gone private. Felicity not sure how to contact you, I missed that you were going private.
I have considered myself even a few times even considered just closing....but I do like coming here it is a corner just for me.

Was nice catching up and seeing how many lives have changed including mine.....I see how my blog post have dropped more and more then since we began homeschooling.

video of MAYS camp

MAYS Camp

This summer we attended 2 orchestra summer camps. Between the camps and my hospital stay I just realized I never posted our MAYS camp week.

My oldest sang with his friends as they preformed "Back in the USSR".

First day of camp 

Fun at the hotel after a day of camp 

Daddy took us out one night for a nice dinner..things we don't do normally...

 Everyone worked hard to finish school so they could have a summer vacation this year. 

http://www.maysymphony.org/MAYS_Summer_Camp.html

Last day preparing for the concert performance 

This my third born "Pooh Bear" he was in the hall waiting his turn

.

My second born "Piglet"

Love this picture has my oldest "Tiger and Pooh Bear" together 

Pooh Bear brought his drum and he actually got to play it this made camp for him

This is the cello choir 

The Fiddle choir awesome have on video

We had a great time, relaxing....no laundry, no cooking...was nice to get up go down have breakfast before heading out to a wonderful day with awesome friends and music. 

Then come back to a clean room and swimming.....and relaxing...........was soooooooo much needed........

Aldi's shopping outcome

So a week has passed since I shopped at Aldi....So far it has not been liked in our home.
The quality of their food has been very disappointing. This time I have to agree with my husband, normally I feel he is just being to picky. We had their cheese filled raviolis they were just terrible, the filling tasted like a imitation powder. The potato chips my husband took one bit and asked me what I did.

The cheese there is good price and the quality is not bad at all.

The final decision is that between the drive to even get to Aldi's it is not worth it. I can do better with B1G1 at Walmart and have the quality and brands we like.

Shopped at Aldi

So yesterday I tried Aldi for our week of shopping. I did come out spending less but I also walked out with less.

Not sure how people shop there all the time......many items we don't eat. Then with a large family the meats are not packaged for family size. I would have to buy 2-3 packs for a dinner.

I did save on butter and tomato. Oh ice cream also. I feel I do better when I do B1G1 at Walmart.

Getting back to school

We are beginning our school year already. Started on Friday with setting up our books and table...checking out the new books and what to do daily.

Today though is first full day....we obviously loved having a summer vacation this year. It is so hard getting back into school, but we must. Come end of August orchestra begins and need to stay on top so we don't fall behind. Plan could change but as it stands right now we will be in two orchestra's. This is going to require us being more diligent with our day and week.

On the mend

Now that I have time and can even think straight. Summer began on a good foot I knew it was going to be a  full 3 weeks.
What I didn't prepare for was me in the ER being admitted and surgery the next day.

Week began in Orlando with a week of orchestra camp, awesome fun filled week.
Came home Saturday, plan was to tend to the house and wash all our clothing and repack for another wonderful orchestra camp.

Plans are plans and reality is something else. Early morning hours on Thursday I woke in severe pain I have never felt before, labor would be better. At the ER I found I had an infection and a kidney stone. ER Dr. thought surgery right away but the urologist decided to wait........until......I was throwing up so bad that I was dehydrating even on the IV. By next morning I was being prep'd for the surgery. Turned out the stone would have never passed and I was badly swollen that the stent had to be left in.....between all the pain meds and being treated as if the infection was in my blood stream....it has taken a week to even recall everything that went on....my two younger children were with me in the ER and throughout my admission. They were awesome helping their mommy, and texting everyone also keeping in touch with daddy as he worked and had our two older boys.

Saturday afternoon I came home and with meds in hand and began packing for our orchestra camp. Was not going to allow this to upset our plans. First 2-3 days I walked in a cloud, my brain felt fried. It was about Thursday when the headache and the funny feeling went away. I am still sore from the stent it comes out on Wednesday. Not looking forward to it in the office but be glad to be back to myself.

I would say our summer has been very full so far and looking forward to some down time......to regroup before school starts up for us.

Leesburg camp

So this past week my three younger children and I spent in Leesburg with the Central Florida Youth Orchestra summer camp.

We went over Sunday and stayed until Saturday. Monday was the first day of camp, with Friday having a concert of all a week can produce. It really is amazing in all the kids learn in one week.
My husband and oldest came over Tuesday night to spend the night with us, take us out to dinner. My husband found a place called Hurricanes...yummy!!! The best I have had in a long time. The beer battered friend pickles best I have ever had.
As we ate we had an awesome view of Dead River with baby gators. Momma gator did show up but I didn't get a picture.
Made some new friends that I could see being long time friends. Homeschool family with 9 children and she quilts.
This week was some what the close to our summer.... We need to start the new school year...our orchestra's will be starting back up in August so the jump start keeps us on track for the year.
We will still do a summer thing once a week with my dear friend.

Mini vacation

Great start to our summer a mini vacation. Plans have changed about 3 times, but that is ok. We are enjoying ourselves with family.

The cousins are having a great time together. My sister in law had girl time.

Cousins are having a blast....

1 Timothy 3-5

God lead me to 1Timothy today. He spoke to me as why i must let go of my church and pray for them.....God showed me what my husband was explaining to me and why certain things must happen before we could ever go back there.

Amazed by my oldest son

This past spring semester, my son took Audio Engineering. He made a few connections that has led him to do some work with what he learned.

He has run the sound and recording for a talent show

He also now has the awesome benefit to even work on all the editing needs track labeling so that CDs can be made.

This is a great learning experience that he can use when he graduates high school with his AA. He will already have sound recording and operating and editing experience. On too of the class instruction.

Child Training Bible

http://www.childtrainingbible.com/

I have been looking and thinking about this teaching/helper tool for awhile...
Awhile back, I had said to my husband that it would be such a huge help to have a bible just like this.
I am learning God's word right along with my children. This tool could be a big help for all of us....

I have been putting it off though.....

Every day the past month when I am  on the web, I am seeing the http://www.childtrainingbible.com/p/what-is-ctb.html this has just placed it on my heart that it is time to purchase and put to use in our home.

I talked to my husband and his response was why haven't I gotten it yet.

Cant wait to put it to use this year.... especially since we have encountered a trial this season that has left us without a church family......

Will blog more about it after I receive....

School year wrapping up....

I am so proud of my 4 children!

My oldest has finished up his 2nd semester of college in the Dual enrollment program. He got a "98" in English 1102! Way to go Collin. (applaud and cheering)

Everyone told him it was so hard and that I was wrong for putting him in a 7 week class instead of the 15 week.
He told me it was so easy.... Would like to have more classes like that next semester.
We are waiting on the rest of his grades but I have no doubt. That they are all a's and b's.

My youngest son; Pooh bear, just wrapped up his math and asked to begin his new book right away. We do Saxon so he is beginning 6/5. He also has finished his explode the code and wordly wise.
If he is wanting to start the new book then I am grabbing the chance, he normally is the total opposite. I am happy for Pooh bear to feel he has accomplished something and it has given him incentive.

My baby girl is so far ahead, almost done in Saxon 5/4. She is on lesson 92. Before summer is over she will be in 6/5 with her older brother. She is only 9 and just loves school. All her other school is already done also, looking to order her a new wordly wise book. Trying to decide on the wordly wise version to use now that rock solid doesn't have the original version. refuse to use 3000 3rd, don't like that they put the answer key in the teacher manual, and charging 30.00 for it.

My middle son, Piglet, the music talent of our family. He is doing great with a push: before summer end he will have his math done. Almost has completed his wordly wise.

This is the first summer since we began homeschool I don't feel like our whole summer has to be spent on catching up.

We are going to take a break small but a break and we are going to do some fun school with geography, history and literature. Plus rearrange the classroom for a new start.

This fall is bringing new seasons into my families life.

offenses

The church body has been reading "The Bait of Satan" by John Bevere.

I highly recommend this to book to everyone.

It is some good food to digest and that will feed you, I have been able to actually see myself in this book.
I have felt offended by family, friends and strangers. It is so much more hurtful when it comes from someone close to you.

How am I to respond? Have I really truly forgiven? Have I fully turned it over to God?

Or have I actually allowed the offense to stay somewhere with in? If the tiniest speck of offense is in your soul it will grow.  Once that poison is there growing you can find offense in everything and everyone in your daily life.

I want to let go and be free of offense, I want to have a loving closer relationship with my Father.
He is the only one that truly loves me, so why would I not want to please him and be closer to him.

Love this song....

This Sunday is the day!!

I get to sing it...with my best friend.

Have been working months towards joining the praise team, and one quick swooze went from practicing to being on praise team and singing this song this Sunday.

I am so happy and excited and terrified all at once. Is that possible? Now just to keep the trembling down so no one detects it.

Praying for Gods comfort to flow in and through me.

Spring Break

Last week was our spring break. It was nice to have a break from the go, go, go. Even though the week seemed very full it was filled in a different way.

My days are longer now with second half of the semester beginning today. Means better schedule adherence so that we get done the things we need too.

Everyone including me is working on Easter music for church. My husband and our boys are playing their string instruments and I am singing with the Praise team. I am so excited have been working towards this every Tuesday for past several months.

Well of to finish up our nightly chores so that we can rest for another beautiful day.

Beautiful weather

I am sitting outside soaking in Gods beauty.
Spring is my favorite time.
Reminds me of Jesus's promises. Looking at the pine trees I think I missed the crosses this year. A few years back the pines were full of crosses all at one time. Just an awesome sight.
So far the bugs are not bad,
Cool breeze
Kids out playing.
Dinner on a grill.
Plants blooming
Crickets singing
Best of all a sunset
What could be better to end a day.